Home > You in B&W > The Mirror – Help Me See What I’m Not Seeing

The Mirror – Help Me See What I’m Not Seeing


I have a friend who is already extremely accomplished and someone I admire greatly.  We are both busy and just can’t get together often enough.  When we do,  it’s an intense flurry of conversation between both of our lives.  I heard recently that the year of zero (2010) is the year of new beginnings and that is a great way to look at this year for both of us.

“she used the word “draining” to describe it”

In our latest conversation, she was drawing on my little notepad and describing her latest work.  Her first box represented the current work she’s doing that is very easy and lucrative.  The second box represented something she’s been approached to do.  In describing box #2, her body hunched, she used the word “draining” to describe it, and indicated that it wouldn’t really do anything for her. THEN, she drew the third box, representing her next idea of what she wants to do.  It was an “AHA” for her to move in this direction.  Her body straightened up, she looked up, her eyes were bright, and there was a distinct change in her voice and word choice to describe the work.

“her body straightened up [and] her eyes were bright”

This third body of work would harness her background expertise, become a source of income, and feed her soul, too.  She recognized that this work would harness her strong N and J (MBTI).  She already knew this part.  The fact that she is picking a direction and will do the work to get there is a reflection of her strong J.  When I pointed out the polar differences between how she described box #2 & #3, it was shocking for her and provided immediate insight into pursuing #3 and whether or not to go forward with #2 at all.

Even when we are already self-aware-savvy, having a friend or colleague who is also aware can help point out things that you didn’t see yourself – acting like a mirror.  As much as we may want to achieve knowing ourselves clearly (in black & white), we are complex beings and ever evolving.  It’s a beautiful reflection of the life-long journey we are on.  What you do with this information makes all the difference.  Will you take action?  Will you turn the dial (even just a little bit) in a different direction?

Why would you not?

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